Having Forever
by Kaylarea
Summary: Sara has to make a choice between two men, both offering her a wonderful life. Did she choose correctly? GSR.
1. Chapter 1

Sara knew she had let this 'relationship', if you could call it that, go way to far. She had been trying desperately to figure out how to tell him that she needed this relationship to be over. Truth be told, he was a great man, he could love her, cherish her, protect her, be everything, a great partner, friend, and everything a good husband could and should be.

But he wasn't the man that she wanted to love, hold on to, and be a partner with. Oh, she knew in time she could possibly learn to love him, she cared for him deeply, that she knew she couldn't deny that, but love? That was another ball game all together.

He had told her every time he got how much he loved her and needed her, and wanted to be only with her. As always when she looked into his eyes, she wished she had the strength and courage to tell him, that she was so terribly sorry for stringing him along, and that there was another woman out there, who would be able to fully return his feelings, one who would love him for him, from the moment she set eyes not him, not like her, who could only hope that this would end, or that she could learn to love him.

So when he decided to get down on one knee, and ask for her hand, she froze. What was she going to say? She didn't want to be his wife. Hell, she didn't even want to be his girlfriend anymore. But did she want to be alone the rest of her life? Weighing on both options as this wonderful man was waiting for a response, any response, Sara decided to quell his fears, until she could figure out, if she could get a definitive answer from the only man she ever loved, about 'what to do about this.'

"Nick, I, I'm not saying no. I want you to understand that, but this is a very big decision, not just for me, but you too. I, I just think I need some time to decide." Sara tried to answer her friend in the nicest way possible. She could see him relax when she told him she wasn't saying no, but he slow in his movement to a smile.

"Sure, anything you want. But take this with you, you know, so you can fully think." Nick smiled softly at her as he handed her the ring box.

Sara smiled and leaned in and kissed him, somewhat passionately so that he would hopefully be thrown off the scent of her wavering feelings and if everything went the way she hoped, her presence all together.

"Thank you." She whispered as they parted, seeing him smiling proudly, thinking he was giving her the space she needed in order to commit to him fully. He understood her fear, he knew she was slipping away, but he never could figure out why. So he hoped his consideration of her feelings, and needs would be enough to prove to her that, he really did love her, and would be everything she ever needed.

Sara breathed a sigh of relief as she entered the confines of her apartment all alone. Nick having dropped her off before heading home. She carefully placed the ring into her dresser drawer, hoping she would never actually have to look at it again, let alone place it on her finger.

She ran a hand through her hair, trying to maintain a normal level of breathing, but she couldn't hold it together much longer, she needed a drink, she needed someplace to run, she needed him.

She opened up her freezer to find the bottle of vodka. She hadn't touched it months, not since Grissom had been to her apartment ,and told her how drowning in a bottle of alcohol would solve nothing for her. It was the same day she had opened up to him, fully let him in. He was the only person on the planet she had ever trusted enough to tell him about her childhood. That and he was the only man she would ever fully trust with her heart.

She poured her self a glass, and stared at it debating. She knew the comfort it could give, at lest for a few hours of unconsciousness. But she also knew she need to see Grissom immediately. She settled for taking one swing from the glass before placing the bottle back into the freezer, this followed by one emergency cigarette, and she was out the door the ever obnoxious ring box with her.

She fought the urge to toss the stupid rock out the window as she drove, knowing that would no more help her than the vodka. She tried to figure out what the hell she was going to say to him, as she put the Denali into park outside Grissom's townhouse. Unfortunately coming up with nothing, but the simple fact that she loved him with every fiber of her being she assumed to position to fly by the seat of her pants.

Sara took one last deep breath, before shoving the ring box into the pocket of her leather jacket, and slamming the car door possibly to roughly.

Three knocks on his door was all it took. He opened it, and surprise was written all over his face, as he took in the sight of the beautiful woman in his entry way. She was clad in a blue spaghetti strapped dress, that draped her tall, lithe frame beautifully. With the addition of some eyeliner she normally wouldn't have adorned and the blue kitten heels she was stunning.

"Sara, what are you doing here?" He asked her concern taking over the initial shock.

"I,I really need to talk with you." She rushed out.

"Okay, I'm all yours come on in."

Once she shed her coat and they were seated comfortably in his living room, did Sara begin to speak.

"Gil, I know we've had our moments in the past, and I know you've made your opinions of us very clear, but I overheard what you said to Lurie in the interview room, and I guess I just need to know, once and for all, if you really have no feelings for me whatsoever I'll leave and never bother again. But if you do feel something for me, the slightest feeling at all, I need to know, and I need to know now." She very nearly sobbed out.

Gil was slow in his response, questions running through his mind. What would make Sara give him such an ultimatum? Not that he didn't deserve it. Why was she so dressed up, if she was only coming to speak with him?

Gil knew what his mind was saying; _let her go. She doesn't need you. _

But if this was the only chance he was ever going to get to tell Sara how he felt, you better bet your ass that he was going to take it. No matter the consequences.

"Sara, I love you." He told her. And from the moment those words fell of his lips, he knew he should've shared that feeling with her, long ago.

Sara raised her eyes to meet his, the still glistening of tears there, as she whispered out in disbelief, "What?"

Gil moved so that he was next to Sara, and he gently wiped away her tears and repeated again, "Sara I love you."

Sara closed her eyes knowing she was dreaming. Gil Grissom had just told her the only thing she had ever needed, or wanted to hear. She slowly formed a small smile. "You really love me?"

"With all my heart." He answered her with a kiss. When they pulled apart they were both smiling like fools.

"Sara, why did you come here tonight to ask me that?" Gil asked as he held her hand.

"I came here because I was faced with an impossible decision, and I needed to know that I was making the correct choice." Sara informed him as she pulled out the ring box. "I haven't even looked at the thing. But from the moment he was asking me to marry him, I knew I couldn't. Not when you were the one holding my heart. It's always been you Gil, always." Sara said softly as she was looking into those beautiful blue orbs.

"Sara, I don't know what exactly possessed you to come over here tonight, but I thank my lucky stars, for whatever it was. I truly love you Sara, and I never could figure out how to tell you that, but you've had my heart as long as I can remember, and if you'd give me the chance, I can be everything you need. Sara please, I want nothing more to be with you." Gil professed.

Sara could feel all the conflicting emotions she had been feeling leave her, to be replaced with the only feeling she had ever wanted, love. She knew with all that she had that he was telling her the truth, she could see it in his eyes, and feel it in the way he was softly holding her hand. She knew she'd give this man just about anything, so long as he asked. And she knew without a doubt that she was making the right choice.

"Oh, Gil." She whispered as she leaned in to kiss him, finally letting all her cards fall onto the table. She wound her hands into his soft curls as he was placing soft kisses on her neck. She carefully removed her hands and moved them to his shirt, undoing the buttons one by one, until she could feel the muscles of his broad chest under her fingertips.

He slowly moved the straps of Sara's dress so that they were off of her shoulders as his hands moved softly over her back. She moaned in response. He ever so carefully picked Sara up and carried her down the hallway her shoes falling off with his shirt not far behind. His lips never moved from hers as he set her onto the soft fabric of the comforter covering the king sized bed.

Sara moved to undo his belt, as a gentle hand stopped hers. "Sara, are you sure? I mean we just told each other how we feel tonight." Gil asked as he looked deeply into her eyes. "I don't want to rush you, or ruin things for us, before they started."

Sara looked up at him, from the bed, she knew he was genuinely concerned, for their beginnings of a relationship, but she had waited nearly six years for this man, to tell her how he felt and she was in no way going to lose him.

"Gil, I've never been more sure of anything in my life. I love you, and I want to be with you now and everyday until I die, and that starts now." She told him nothing wavering.

"Oh Sara." Gil murmured before moving to kiss her again, whilst removing his belt and jeans. He felt the exact same way she did. He loved her and wanted nothing but to be with her, and that started today.

They parted as the dress fell onto the floor, and they each looked deeply into each other eyes, assessing the others desires, and needs. After fully understanding each others position by nothing more than the mere glace of eyes did they each make their final move. Two bodies moving as one, until each had reached it's peak.

"Gil…." Sara murmured her hands playing with his curls as he descended beside her. "That was amazing."

Gil chuckled. "I couldn't agree more. Sleep now Sara, we've got forever, to speak to each other."

"I love you." Sara whispered as she curled comfortably into his arms as sleep overpowered her.

"As I love you." Gil whispered kissing her temple.

Neither knowing what the consequences of their actions would have on just about everyone's lives.

* * *

so please tell me what you think, i've already got the next chapter of this typed, so please let me know if you'd like more. I promise the entire Nick situation will be handled, with a few sparks but, everything will work out for our favorite geek couple... Let me know! Kayla


	2. Chapter 2

When Sara woke up the next morning she couldn't keep the smile off of her face. She was here with Gil. Gil! The only man she had ever loved, and she finally had a chance to have everything with him, and she couldn't have been happier.

"Morning." Sara smiled at him as looked up at her. He knew he would be a happy man if he was allowed to look into those eyes and see that smile every morning.

"Good morning." He answered her with a smile of his own.

"So, how you feeling this morning? Haven't changed your mind have you?"

"Sara, I definitely haven't changed my mind, and I never will."

"Good answer." She mumbled as she leaned in to kiss him again as the annoying chirp from her cell phone pulled them apart.

"Don't think you got off that easy, I'll be back." She breathed leaving him stunned as she pulled his shirt over her, as she moved down the hall after the beeping.

Gil Grissom was a lucky man.

"Hello." Sara answered a little over happy, not even thinking of looking at the caller ID.

"Hey darlin' how are you doing this morning?" Nick's southern lilt burning in her ears as she paled.

"I'm doing fine. You?" She asked panicking as she was aimlessly trying to locate her strewn articles of clothing.

"I'd be doing better if I was with you, with that ring on your finger."

"Oh, um, Nick can we meet for lunch, I need to talk to you, about that. I've made a decision." _I think_.

"Okay, I'll meet in an hour at Franks." He said hopefully.

"Yeah, that's great see you later." She breathed into the phone as she pulled on her panties, and shoved the dress over her head, pulling it down roughly, as she ambled back down the hallway to find Gil.

"Everything all right Sara?" Gil asked concerned, as she was trying very hard to pull on her heels.

"Yes, no. I don't know! All I know is that I love you, and want to stay here with you, but I have to go formally break Nick's heart, or continue being a lying, cheating girlfriend to two wonderful men." Sara ranted a tear coming to eye, as she sat down on the end of the bed defeated.

"Oh, Sara. I'm so sorry. We shouldn't have…last night." Gil said as he moved closer to her.

"No, Gil, don't think this is your fault, it's mine, I should've broke it off last night with Nick, but I was afraid that you'd not want me, and I didn't want to be alone. So I didn't, and I now I have to deal with the consequences. But I want you to know that I in no way regret last night. You, or us."

"I don't regret it at all either. And I'll be here waiting for you, to return to me." Gil said honestly.

"You still want me? After what I did?" Sara asked shocked.

"Sara, I'll always want you." Gil promised her with a kiss.

"You're too good to be true, you know that right?"

"No, I just love you, and this is what you do when you love someone. You wait." Gil informed her.

"Okay, I'm going to go home and change and deal with Nick. Is it all right if I come back here?" She whispered.

"Of course, honey."

"Okay." Sara complied kissing Gil one last time before leaving hastily.

* * *

As the warm spray of the water fell over her body, Sara tried to sort through the information in her mind. She was still romantically involved with Nick, but she was definitely involved romantically with Gil, and she was in no way backing out of that relationship. She admittedly knew her liaison with Gil had been 'wrong' in the since that she was still involved with someone else. But she didn't feel bad that it had happened at all, only that it had happened while she was still stringing along Nick.

She knew she was going to have to tell him the truth, about everything. Her feelings, and about Gil. It was going to be the only way she would be able to forgive herself for hurting him. And she only hoped that her best friend could find it in his heart to forgive her and let her go.

Even if it meant letting her go with Gil.

Sara took a deep breath as she looked at herself in the mirror one last time before leaving the confines of her home.

She wasn't at all surprised to Nick waiting for her, with two cups of coffee. He knew that her sanity depended on a caffeine regiment.

"Hey." She breathed out softly with a small smile trying to ease the nerves, of this man before she broke him into pieces completely.

"Hey." He smiled back.

"Nick, you know that I care for you, and I never in a million years dreamed of hurting you, in the way I am about too. And I'm saying this now, because I have a feeling I won't be getting it out later. I am so very, very sorry." Sara started out.

"But, I can't accept this ring, and marry you. It wouldn't be fair to you, or to me. I love Gil, and I know that if I married you, I'd be settling for you, and you don't deserve that. You deserve to be with someone who truly loves you, not just thinks of you very fondly." Sar paused to take a breath before continuing.

"And you're really going to hate me for this, but, as of last night I am seeing Gil. And I'm happy with him." Sara finished as she gently set the ring box in front of Nick's folded hands.

She was expecting yelling, crying, cursing anything but his calm demeanor. "I've always known you loved him, I guess I just thought, you could maybe love me a little bit too. I would've been fine with that." His voice getting soft as he asked finally, "Did you sleep with him?"

Sara felt her eyes well with tears as he heart ached for the pain she was causing him, but she couldn't lie, not now, not to him. "Yes, I did." She whispered looking ashamed at her hands.

"Okay then." Nick said as he stood to leave. "I'm glad you're happy Sara, you deserve it."

"Wait that's it?" Sara asked dumbfounded.

"Yeah that's it."

"You're not going to yell me? Call me horrible names? Nothing?"

"No, Sara I'm not. You're an amazing woman, and Gil is lucky to have you. And I know everything aside, you never wanted to hurt me, you never wanted to hurt anyone. I know you well enough to know, what you did, wasn't out of spite, or anything other than your love for him. Actually, I'm impressed you were honest with me. That means a lot." Nick finished as he left the diner.

_He couldn't believe she'd do anything like that intentionally, it just wasn't the woman that he loved. _

_It wasn't Sara. _

_He was going to let her go, because she had been honest with him, and acted nobly for what she had done. Oh, how he loved her._

_Enough to let her go….._

Sara wasn't sure how long she sat there as the tears fell. She knew she had done the right thing in telling Nick everything, she just hoped that she could forgive herself for hurting him so.

* * *

"Gil?" Sara called softly as she entered the townhouse.

"I'm up here." Gil called letting her know that he was in the kitchen.

"Hey." She muttered giving him a small smile.

"Hello, how'd everything go?" Gil asked softly looking away from the stove.

"Nick is an amazing man, for someone. He didn't yell, cry, nothing. He actually thanked me for telling him the truth about us. I think I would've felt better had he yelled, maybe a little less guilty. I don't understand it at all." Sara told him as she slumped down into a kitchen chair.

"That's Nick. He is a gentleman in every since of the word. But are _you _okay?"

"I'll be okay. I know I made the right decision. I did make the right decision, right?" She challenged looking up Gil.

"I think you did." He answered kissing her passionately.

"Good, we agree."

"Are you hungry?" He asked.

"Yes! I'm starving. I was too nervous to eat earlier. What did you make?"

"Spaghetti." Gil smiled crookedly at her making her heart stop.

"Hmmm my favorite." She smiled back.

"So I thought." Gil said softly.

"You know, I could get used to this." Sara told him.

"Get used to what?"

"Seeing you smiling at me everyday. Us enjoying meals together. It's nice."

"It is. I think I could get used to it too." Gil agreed clicking off the burners on the stove.

"However I could also get used to seeing you in the bedroom, what do you think of that?" Sara challenged raising her eyebrow giving him a devilish grin.

"I think I may just be in heaven." He answered her as he moved to close the distance between them, his lips colliding with hers as they moved back into the bedroom, in a well practiced manor.

"Déjà vu?" Sara joked smiling as he set her into the bed.

"A little, but this time, you're not going anywhere, in the morning."

"I couldn't agree more, I want to stay here forever."

"I want you to stay here forever." Gil answered as he moved to kiss her once more, igniting the flames of the fire that fueled them both trying desperately to ignore the chirp of a cell phone behind him.

"Yours?" He asked pulling away from her.

"Nope, mines on vibrate. It's you." She answered.

He scowled as she reached for the phone answering in normal fashion, "Grissom."

Sara couldn't hear who was on the end of the line, or who it was, but she knew it wasn't good. Gil's normally smooth mask, she would jokingly attribute it as his 'poker face' was gone, and a feared, almost angry look replaced it as the person on the other end of the line continued to speak. It seemed like eternity before Gil disconnected the line. Tension building in the room as Sara finally decided to speak.

"Gil? Is everything okay?"

"No, Sara we have a scene to attend too, but will you promise me something?" He answered her slowly.

"Yes."

"If I tell you to move, stay or be still. Promise that you'll do it. It's for your own safety."

"I promise." She answered the fear rooting deep.

"Oh my…." Sara trailed off as they arrived at the scene. They were in some part of the Nevada forest, she hadn't cared enough to pay attention to where. There was a cabin, that was all but going up in smoke, as more paramedics than Sara had ever seen in her life, were removing woman after woman victim from the cabin. All nude, and all baring the same horrific mauling marks, in various stages of healing.

"Gil, what happened here?" She whispered moving closer to him.

"This was the hostage sight of a very dangerous man, and we just got the location not even two hours ago, right as this place went up in flames. His game was kidnapping woman, and raping them, over and over again, each time he fulfilled that he would cut them, somewhere on the torso, arms, neck. He didn't care. But you could tell which were his favorites."

"And he is?"

"Still missing, possibly around here. SWAT is here, but you can never be too careful. Sara I'd like you to stay here while I speak to Brass. I'll be back." Gil asked her. She was about to refuse but remembering her promise she crawled back into the dark safe place of the Denali. She was looking at case notes Gil had left in the car, when suddenly her door opened up. She assumed it was Gil, so she was slow to look over at the person aside her.

When she did, her brown eyes were locked with the fierce green colored ones, belonging to a man she didn't know. He flashed his hands out faster than she thought possible, and was completely blocking off her air supply.

"You make any noise I'll kill you here and now." He growled in her ear, as he turned her about so that he was able to remove her service weapon, badge and cell phone before placing them on the seat she once occupied. He then scooped her up and began to move her away from the vehicle, he had told her not to scream, he had said nothing of kicking the Denali door hard enough to shatter the glass and hopefully gain Gil's attention.

From her position over this man's shoulder she was allowed one last look at Grissom, their eyes locking for a split second before she felt a sharp blow to her head, and she fell into the darkness, as she was placed unceremoniously into the backseat of a vehicle and her attacker sped off into the dark Las Vegas night.

* * *

Okay, please tell me what you think! Another chapter tomorrow, probably the last one until I get back from my trip. Don't worry I'll only be gone a week, then I'll post as soon as I can ;) Kayla!


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you so much to those of you reading and reviewing! I will admit this was not the chapter I intended to write, but the voice in my head demanded to be satisfied, and so I apologize if this wasn't what you all wanted, but I promise Sara will be all right. So if you don't hate me by the end of this chapter please leave me a review, and i'll post again tomorrow. Things for our couple will be better! Kayla

* * *

As Sara regained consciousness, she was aware that she was being pinned down to something. She guessed by the hard surface it was a table, or board of some sort. As the fog dissipated its self from her brain, she also became aware of a pain in her most private of areas and of the smell of blood.

She tried to lift her head to get a good look at herself, it took more strength than she thought it would. As a pounding sensation refused to leave her head. She took inventory of the two gashes across her arm. The bleeding was stopped as the coagulated blood was now caked on the table beneath her. She moved her eyes to that of her trunk area, it was unmarked, except for the forming of bruises, that only could've been made by an attacker.

She laid back down and closed her eyes tight, willing herself to wake up from this horrid nightmare she knew she was in. But she couldn't. But she sure as hell could remember what Gil has last told her before she was taken about the man, who wasn't caught, and what he liked to do to his victims. And by the looks of it, she had been used twice in her unconscious state.

She knew Gil had seen her being taken and she knew he was looking for her as she laid here. She stiffened immediately as she heard the sound of two male voices approaching.

"Oh, looks like our CSI is awake. I think we agreed you got her when she was conscious." The man Sara recognized as the one who pulled her from the car, spoke to his partner, who had a much higher toned voice as he stepped closer to Sara, and moved her hair away from her face.

"Hey, sweet thing. My turn, normally I don't like seconds, but your good looking enough I may not care." He breathed against her chin as she tried to wiggle away from him and off the table.

"Oh no, no. You're not going anywhere. You and me are going to get well acquainted." He told her as she heard the ominous sound of a zipper being undone.

"Remember to mark her, for every time you, score Tim." The green eyed man said tossing a knife at his partner as Sara was praying someone would save her from this hell.

* * *

"Damn it Jim! They took her, and I know exactly what they are doing to her, and you want me to just stand here, and wait for you to make a decision. Sara is my life and I am not going to loose her!"Gil fumed.

"Gil, I'm going to do everything in my power to find Sara, you know that, but there is a procedure we have to follow. Now, was there anything on Sara's person that might have had a locating device in it?" Jim asked just as frustrated as Gil.

"I don't know, her phone and badge did, but those were left with us. Wait! Her watch!"

"Okay, let's Archie on it, and Mandy on prints from her badge." Jim said as he went to speak to Mandy, and Gil went to find Archie.

"Archie I need you to try to locate a watch GPS, it belongs to Sara, I have the frequency." Gil said solemnly handing the younger man the digits.

The ten minutes that passed seemed to never end. Someone was out there hurting Sara, his Sara. He would never forgive himself is she wasn't found soon and safely in his arms.

"I've got it!" Archie exclaimed, giving Gil the information, then Gil was racing down the hallway to find Jim.

* * *

"Please, just stop." Sara panted out delirious from the pain and plummeting blood pressure as she was slowly bleeding out.

"Oh, no can do cupcake. You're even better than I thought, how's about another go?" Tim taunted as he thrust his way back into Sara, causing her blackout, her nerves overloading on the pain.

When she came round again, she knew this was it. She was going to die, and be gone for good. She could feel the blood running over her body, hot and sticky as it was drying. She was having a hard time collecting oxygen, and just prayed that whatever way she left this world that it would happen soon.

She was sure she was dead when she heard Gil's voice registering in her ears. The sound of an angel from her own personal heaven.

"_I'm here." She answered the voice in her head._

"Sara! Wake up! Baby please!" He pleaded with her.

_Wake up? She was awake. Why wasn't he understanding that? _

"Sara, don't you dare do this to me! Open those beautiful brown eyes for me!" Gil called as he shook her.

"_Okay, Gil, Whatever you say…."_

It took all she had, to do as he was asking of her, but when she did, she didn't regret it in the slightest. Her scared eyes were met with those loving blue orbs. She wasn't dead, and he wasn't the voice of an angel. He was here holding her, begging her not to leave him.

"Oh, thank goodness." Gil breathed as he saw Sara was registering what he was saying.

"Honey, we're going to get you to the hospital, but you're going to be okay, I won't leave you." He told her as her senses were taking more control of the situation.

She was aware of his coat coving her, from the embarrassed view of the police officers and of Jim. Her hands were freed, and her wrists and ankles were rubbed raw from the bindings that had been removed. And she was also very aware of the two EMT's coming her way.

"No, no." She mumbled into Gil's shoulder.

"Sara we need to get you to the hospital." Gil repeated not understanding her cries, as the male paramedics approached her, and moved to remove the coat from her in order to check her vitals.

"No! Don't touch me! Get away from me!" Sara screamed as she was trying desperately to get away from the men.

"Ma'am we need to transport you. Please calm down." One of them tried to reason with her, but she was having non of it.

"No! Gil! No!" She pleaded looking up him, his understanding kicking in. _She doesn't want or trust any man touching her right now._

"Okay, Sara shhh, it's okay. I've got you. Is all right if I pick you up?" He asked her to the confusement of the EMT's.

She nodded softly as she placed her arms around his neck. As he lifted her up in one fluid motion, trying to cause her as little discomfort as possible. Brass then came and added his coat to cover the rest of Sara's body from view.

"I'll get her the hospital, I promise." Gil told the paramedics.

* * *

"How is she?" Catherine asked arriving at the hospital.

"She's heavily sedated. They stitched up, or covered all eight slashes. Three on her arms and five across her breasts and torso. She needs a SAE kit collected, when the doctor tried to do it, Sara about lost it. So they sedated her, and I called you. She doesn't trust anyone with a Y chromosome at the moment and I don't blame her." Gil told the redhead feeling lost. "Please be gentle."

" I will, I promise. She trusted you. She let you touch her. That must mean something" Catherine reminded him, softly as she entered Sara's room, to collect the worst SAE of her career.

"Um, Gil, she's awake and asking for you." Catherine whispered as she headed back to lab.

"Sara?" Gil asked softly coming to sit next to her, as he reached for her hand, and was rubbing small soothing circles over the back of it.

"Oh, Gil." She cried as the tears started to fall uncontrollably.

"Shhh, Sara. I'm here, it's okay, sweetie." Gil chanted as he moved closer to her so that he could embrace her.

"Hold me please." She breathe out scooting over so that there was room for him on her bed, as he joined her, he wrapped the blankets tighter around her as he cradled her softly against his chest.

"You're okay now Sara. I won't let anyone hurt you ever again. I love you." Gil whispered as he kissed her temple.

"How, could you want me? Or love me after this? I, I look awful!" She protested.

"Sara, I do love you, you did nothing to deserve this. How could I hold that against you? These wounds will heal, and I won't see you any differently. I'll only love you more, knowing you had the strength to fight back and let me in."

"Love you Gil." Sara breathed out as she fell asleep with her head laying on Gil's chest. He smiled down softly at her, she was safe and in his arms, and he couldn't have loved her more.

"I will always love you Sara Sidle, always." Gil held her a little closer to him.

* * *

"Oh hell! Now what are we supposed to do? The CSI didn't die, and her boyfriend was scary, I doubt he'll stop until he has our heads on a platter!" Tim complained to his partner Bill.

"Don't get your panties in a knot, Bill here has a plan. How do you feel about a little undercover work?" Bill smiled devilishly.

"Well now that depends. What did you have in mind?"

"We're going to infiltrate that lab of theirs, and then we're going to take out that brunette beauty, and that boyfriend of hers too."

* * *

please leave me your thoughts, but be gentle!


	4. Chapter 4

Sara had been released from the hospital and it was her first night back on shift. She sighed she looked in the mirror. Her cuts were no longer visible only the pink, jagged lines of a scar showed. She hated being a self conscious as she was, but she didn't want anyone, other than herself, or Gil to see the horrible markings on her pale skin.

Sara very carefully pulled on the tank top with the built in bra, she had found after her release, that wearing a normal bra was painful, due to the way the stitches had healed. She was going to have to see her doctor about getting that fixed. After deciding on a deep blue long sleeved shirt she pulled it gently over her black tank top. Adorned like this, you couldn't see a single one of her scars. Hopefully the air conditioning would be on in the lab.

After she deemed herself presentable did she go down stairs to find Gil.

"You all ready to go?" He asked her softly concerned about her return to work.

"As I'll ever be. Does this cover all right?" She asked concerned about showing any bit of a scar.

"Perfectly." Gil smiled trying to reassure Sara's fears.

"Okay." she nodded as she headed to the car.

Once at work, it was apparent that Sara was more uncomfortable and on edge than even she thought would happen. She hadn't even sat down in the break room to wait for assignments before she was called to see Ecklie.

"Um, Conrad, you wanted to see me." Sara sputtered subconsciously pulling the sleeves of her shirt down further onto her hands, in an effort to hide.

"Yes, I did. I just wanted you to know, you are free to go out into the field, if and when you feel up to it. However if you do not wish to embark on that yet, you are more than welcome to stay in the lab, and help out Greg or something. And the lab will be covering all of your medical expenses." He explained to her rather nicely.

"Oh, um okay. Thank you Conrad." She said surprised at his offers.

"What did Ecklie want?" Gil asked when she returned to the team.

"To tell me I could basically do what I wanted. I'm allowed in the field or lab, whichever I choose for however long I choose, and that the lab will be footing my hospital bill."

"That was nice of him."

"Yes, and very odd, but I think I'm going to take him up on it. I think I'll just stay in the lab tonight."

"Okay, I'll Nicky here with you and Greg, and take Warrick and Catherine with me. Call me if you need anything. I mean it Sara."

She smiled, "I promise to call if I need you, until then, I'll be here waiting for you to come back."

* * *

"So Nicky, what are we up to?" Sara asked trying to sound enthused.

"We are photo documenting evidence. Can you say fun or what?" Nick joked with her easily.

"Fun." Sara mocked him as they started to work. "Hey, Nick who are those men?" She asked pointing to the two men in lab coats on the other side of the hallway.

"I'm not sure, new hires I think. Why?"

"I don't know. They just give me the creeps is all, would you mind terribly if we shut the door? I'm tired of them looking at me." She asked as he shifted her shirt uncomfortably, trying to hide everything from view.

"Fine, with me. Sara you know, you're still beautiful, even with those scars. I hope you know that no one on this team is going to see or treat you any differently. We all love you, no matter what." Nick told her giving her a smile.

Sara had tears in her eyes as she hugged her best friend. "Thank you Nicky. I needed to hear that, from someone other than Gil."

* * *

"So when do we make our move?" Tim whined impatiently.

"Not for a while. We need for her to be comfortable at work again, then we're gonna rock her world, again." Bill answered him.

"Good, I can't wait."

"Neither can I, neither can I."

* * *

so sorry for waiting so long to update, I was out of town than I was having computer issues, I hope this chapter pleased dispite the short length. reviews are always welcome ;)


End file.
